I dated many guys during these two years, some were sweet, some were asshole, etc. However, there were a few standouts that were FREAK. SHOWS.
I think I would be doing everyone a disservice by keeping what happened in the brief times that I dated each of these fucking crazy people to myself. Granted, I have told the following story many times (I'm pretty sure I told it at the Trash Bar during a 10an10a show while Gillian was tuning), but eh, whatever.
"Let me drop a beat"
When I was about 23, I did what most 23 year-olds do, which is "fall in love." Like most 23 year-olds I thought that relationship would "last forever." And, obviously I was wrong. This story is not about that guy (let's call him "Scott"), but a close friend of his. So this close friend (let's call him "Justin"), NEVER talked to me while I was still together with Scott. So I was surprised that he showed up to a roof party I threw after Scott and I had broken up.
Justin immediately got shit-faced at my party, and kept inserting himself into conversations in creepy ways (for example, while I was sitting on my friend Jed's lap and telling him a story, Justin came over and asked if he could sit on Jed's lap too. Fucking WEIRD). Later in the evening (when Justin wouldn't leave), he took me aside and admitted that he'd "always had a thing" for me and "I won't have sex with you tonight, Leah, but I'm probably going to kiss you." So, apparently I didn't really have a choice in any physical stuff he wanted to grossly do to me. Gross. He also kept following me into my room and closing the door every time I went in there to get something. Okay. So if you followed that: I NEVER said I like him back, or that I wanted to do anything, this was all one-sided and very very very creepy.
Later in the year, I finally caved and agreed to meet him for a drink, because I was bored and wasn't seeing anyone. He was wearing make-up over his 3 pimples. Not like tinted Clearasil, or whatever. No. Make-up. I let him buy me drinks until I pretty much couldn't see, and we went to my house (which was across the street from the bar we met at--just in case I needed to make a quick getaway).
I'm not really sure why I let him in my house again, but I think it had something to do with the fact that I was just looking for ANYTHING to get my mind off of my life at the time. Whatever my reasons were, we started kissing on my couch (please be reminded that I was very drunk). We were a few minutes in, when he stopped, grabbed both of my shoulders, and lightly pushed me away. Then without a moment of hesitation he said "Aight, now I'm going to drop a beat!" And, he started beat-boxing.
Usually I am embarrassed by beat-boxing. This time, however, I wanted to kill him, and then myself. So I did the only thing I could think of as a drunk person, which was to grab the squirter bottle meant for the cats (I had a disgusting room mate with disgusting cats then), and I squirted him in the face. "STOP." He stopped for a second. Then he giggled (which was creepier than you can imagine), and grabbed the squirter bottle from my hands, and squirted me back. OH THIS IS A FUN GAME I GUESS! (I assume he was thinking). I'm pretty sure I squirted him in the face a few more times, and then he left, probably thinking that we were having an awesome time being totally crazy and fun with each other!!!! I went on three more dates with this freak show.
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